Once upon a time, there was a woman, in her 5th decade of life, who needed to find a more fulfilling and soulful way to live. She was exhausted, burnt-out. What happened?
She had vague memories of the childhood stuff; she survived difficult teenage years and somehow held it together through depressive university years. She observed her elder sister have mental breakdowns (overdoses) and spend time in psychiatric care. She struggled to support and protect her younger sister (slit wrists). There was so much pain. Why?
When her mother died, after a decade of living with cancer, it broke her. Her whole life was turned upside down. Nothing would, or could, ever be the same again. How?
She met a wonderful, sensitive, kind, caring man – her rock. They promised each other to be together forever. She wanted to put him first, not her f’d up family; escape.
And her father died, but his legacy remained.
She & her new husband settled in a new country, explored and made a home there; raised 4 beautiful children there. And life passed happily enough for another decade.
Until all the coping techniques that had held her together for so long were no longer enough. Denial. Avoidance. Broken. The long-buried truth came bubbling up, in deep, gut-wrenching cries, curled up in agony. Devastation. Depression. Who Am I?
She did the work. She’s still, always, doing the work to show up as a better human being. She built healthy boundaries. She found acceptance, compassion, forgiveness. She removed those people who did not deserve access to her or her family.
She rediscovered her strength and her connection to herself and her guides. She felt love and loved. Trust.
And she slowly found courage and identity and belonging; she was reborn.
🌻
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”
Brene Brown
To The Core 