Trust

Betrayal. How could he? I trusted him.

Adult: Danger. Protect. Shutdown. De-personify.

Frozen echo from the past; denied and inaccessible. How could they? I trusted them.

Child: fear. death. unsafe. helpless. overwhelm. dissociate

Hide. Soul-destroying.

Adult: busy … denial … doing … avoidance …

The avoidance only adding to the suffering. And then the silence …

Ego: no one can be trusted. Not even yourself.

Resistance. Invisibility. Silence. 
Withdrawal. Disconnection. 
Isolation. Depression.

Ego: don’t look … don’t touch … don’t feel … don’t speak …
Soul: Be Still. Be Here. Now.

Curiosity. Resilience. Exploration.

Soul: i love you

Self-examination. Self awareness.

Soul: i am sorry

Truth. Honesty. Patience. Grace.

Soul: please forgive me

Lightness & darkness.

Soul: i am grateful

Hope.

Soul: Breathe ...

Pick over every thread; pull each painful strand and examine each fibre. Find the beginning. The truth. Weighed down, nurturing, pruning, weaving and tending the lies for long enough.

Soul: I am here. Pay attention.

Days, weeks, months, years, decades. Enough.

Soul: I am here. I am safe.

Enough.

Soul: I am here. I am safe. I have a voice.

I spoke. The dense emotions; held in my throat, chest, to my core. A shift. Blocked energy, slowly moving.

Soul: I am here. Now. I am safe. Now. 

Ego: Vulnerability. Exposure. Fear.

Soul: Truth. Freedom. Connection. Light. Love 💛 

Be still in it; feel it.
Give it voice. Not for him. Not for them. 
For me 🌻